The Weathers Report is pleased to announce the following endorsements for the New Orleans elections on Saturday:

Civil Sheriff: Paul R. Valteau, Jr., Democrat

Valteau runs an efficient and user-friendly civil sheriff's office and is one of the only incumbents we are endorsing.

Criminal Sheriff: Gerald DeSalvo, Democrat

Criminals are escaping from the jail even when there isn't a hurricane bearing down on us. And even the ACLU thinks the incumbent's performance during Katrina was abysmal. DeSalvo is a rising star in the city and deserves a shot to serve as criminal sheriff.

Clerk, Criminal District Court: Millard Collins, Democrat

Collins' experience as an attorney in the clerk's office and novel ideas – including bar coding all evidence to be used in upcoming criminal trials – make him the strongest candidate for this important if not prestigious position.

Clerk, Civil Court: Dale Atkins, Democrat

She actually supports consolidating her job with the Clerk of Criminal District Court, which is commendable. Plus, her only opponent has been AWOL since qualifying ended.

Assessors: The IQ Ticket

First District, Maria Elliott, Democrat

Second District, Jackie Shreves, Other

Third District, Errol George, Democrat

Fourth District, Chase Jones, Democrat

Fifth District, Ron Mazier, No Party

Sixth District, Nancy Marshall, Democrat

Seventh District, Charlie Bosworth, No Party

Unlike the cowards at the Times-Picayune and Gambit-Weekly, the Weathers Report does endorse the IQ Ticket. This is not the finest group of politicians ever assembled, by any stretch, as evidenced by their cheesy website and clumsy, unsuccessful attempt to place the "IQ" nickname on the ballots. In fact, the IQ ticket may actually end up doing more harm than good, with the powerful assessors claiming a mandate for the status quo when most, if not all of the incumbents, actually prevail. Regardless, the election of even one of the IQers could raise some eyebrows in the Legislature, where the reforms must begin. Vote IQ.

Mayor: Mitch Landrieu, Democrat

Please see our prior post for details.

Councilmembers at Large, 2 to be elected: Arnie Fielkow, Democrat.

He lost his job with the Saints for resisting Benson's efforts to abandon the city. He worked miracles as the head of non-football operations, selling out game after game at the Superdome, even with Aaron Brooks as quarterback. Jacquelyn Brechtel Clarkson, Democrat, and Oliver M. Thomas, Democrat, are strong candidates also. Honorable mention goes to Roger Wilson, who played Mickey Jarvis in Porky's, because he played Mickey Jarvis in Porky's.

Councilmember, District A: Jay Batt, Republican.

He kept Daneel Park from becoming a FEMA trailer park, which is more than enough for an endorsement from The Weathers Report. We like our pal, Sal Palmisano, Republican, too. We hope they get in a runoff together and manage not to kill each other by election day.

Councilmember, District B: Stacy Head, Democrat.

She's a lawyer with experience putting blighted houses back into commerce, which is exactly what this city needs. If this were not such a serious election, we would give strong consideration to a candidate with less means, Quentin R. Brown, No Party. His theft of roofers' signs and then handwriting his name and his "No More BS" slogan on the back of them was extremely creative.

Councilmember, District C: Jane Ettigner Booth, Democrat.

She was a tough and respected member of the City Planning Commission, and pushed for reforms of the city's antiquated zoning laws. The city badly needs her expertise.

Councilmember, District D: No endorsement.

Councimember, District E: Anyone but the obnoxious incumbent, Cynthia Willard-Lewis.